raise your standards & LEVEL UP *stop dating clowns*

Hailey Gamba
4 Oct 202328:07

TLDRThe speaker emphasizes the importance of raising personal standards, especially in relationships, sharing her journey from dating unsuitable partners to seeking a more fulfilling connection. She encourages self-improvement, valuing oneself, and not settling for less. The key message is to love and honor oneself, to level up in all aspects of life, and to seek partners who respect and value you as much as you do yourself.

Takeaways

  • 🌟 Prioritize self-improvement and self-love to attract healthier relationships.
  • 🚫 Stop accepting low-budget experiences and raise the bar for how you should be treated.
  • 🧠 Level up your mind as well as your looks to avoid being tricked by superficial charm.
  • 💪 Establish and maintain high standards in relationships to ensure self-respect and healthy dynamics.
  • 🏃‍♀️ Recognize the signs of unhealthy relationships and have the strength to walk away.
  • 💡 Understand that raising your standards may lead to solitude, but it's a positive step towards better relationships.
  • 💖 Be less emotionally attached early in relationships to avoid creating false bonds and maintain clear judgment.
  • 🗣️ Clearly state your boundaries, standards, morals, and values, and stand firm on them.
  • 🔄 Shift your focus from seeking validation from others to building a fulfilling single life.
  • 💼 A man truly doing great things won't always be available, and that's a sign of a high-value individual.

Q & A

  • What is the main theme of the video?

    -The main theme of the video is about raising personal standards, particularly in the context of dating and relationships, and making changes to attract healthier and more positive relationships.

  • Why does the speaker feel passionate about discussing raising standards?

    -The speaker feels passionate about this topic because of her personal experiences and journey in healing, growing, and evolving, which led her to attract and be with the type of person she truly wants in her life.

  • What does the speaker suggest is the first step in raising one's standards?

    -The first step suggested by the speaker is to stop accepting low-budget experiences and to raise the bar for how one should be treated in relationships.

  • How does the speaker recommend women level up their lives?

    -The speaker recommends not just leveling up one's physical appearance but also one's mind, ensuring that one's actions and decisions align with the high standards one wishes to uphold.

  • What is the importance of solitude according to the speaker?

    -Solitude is important because it comes with high standards. It allows one to be alone, avoiding distractions and situations that do not serve one's best interests, and helps in focusing on personal growth.

  • Why should one not be too emotionally attached in the early stages of dating?

    -Being less emotionally attached in the early stages of dating allows one to have a clearer perspective, make better judgments, and not be overly invested, which can lead to more balanced and healthier relationships.

  • What does the speaker suggest about the relationship between one's own life and attracting a partner?

    -The speaker suggests that having a full, independent life is attractive and raises one's standards in relationships, as it discourages poor-quality connections and attracts individuals who are also successful and have their own lives.

  • What misconception does the speaker address about love?

    -The speaker addresses the misconception that love is based solely on physical attraction or idealized notions. Instead, she emphasizes the importance of loving someone for their character, values, and how they treat one another.

  • How does the speaker define a high-standards man?

    -A high-standards man, according to the speaker, is someone who is busy with his own life, successful, ambitious, and does not have all day to constantly communicate, as he values his time and has his own goals and interests.

  • What is the speaker's advice for women who are struggling with setting boundaries?

    -The speaker advises women to practice asserting themselves, to state their boundaries clearly, and to stand firm on them without being persuaded to compromise by others.

Outlines

00:00

🌟 Introduction to Raising Standards

The speaker begins by discussing the importance of being a YouTuber and the creative passion it involves. They delve into the topic of the video, which is about raising standards for women, particularly in the context of dating and relationships. The speaker shares their personal experiences and realizations about attracting the right kind of partners and the need for self-improvement and self-reflection. They emphasize the significance of understanding one's own worth and setting high standards for future relationships.

05:01

🚀 The Shift in Dating Experiences

This paragraph discusses the common pattern in dating where the quality of experiences tends to decrease over time. The speaker uses a week-by-week example to illustrate how dates can go from high-end to more casual settings. They highlight the importance of not settling for low-quality experiences and maintaining high standards. The speaker also touches on the need for self-value and the impact it has on attracting partners who treat you well. They stress the importance of not falling into the trap of accepting less than you deserve in a relationship.

10:02

🧠 Leveling Up: Mind Over Matter

The speaker emphasizes the importance of not just improving one's physical appearance but also one's mental and emotional intelligence. They discuss how women often forget to level up their minds, which can lead to being manipulated or tricked by partners. The speaker shares their realization that having high standards is not just about material things but also about personal growth and self-respect. They advocate for women to be discerning, to not divulge too much, and to avoid toxic behaviors. The speaker encourages women to know themselves well enough to walk away from situations that do not align with their standards.

15:04

💭 Solitude and Emotional Intelligence

The speaker talks about the value of solitude and being comfortable with being alone as a part of having high standards. They share their personal experiences with relationship patterns and the realization that replacing one relationship with another does not lead to finding a person of value and respect. The speaker encourages the audience to not let distractions or less desirable situations prevent them from achieving their goals. They also discuss the importance of being less emotionally attached early in relationships and the benefits of taking time to truly get to know someone without rushing into emotional bonds.

20:06

💪 Standing Firm on Your Standards

The speaker stresses the importance of stating your boundaries, standards, morals, and values, and then standing firm on them. They share their experiences of how they have improved their dating life by not giving in to persuasion and maintaining control over their emotions and actions. The speaker encourages the audience to be present and enjoy the process of dating without overthinking or rushing into things. They also discuss the importance of not always revealing everything to a potential partner and the value of letting them reveal their true selves over time.

25:06

💖 Self-Love and Independence

The speaker talks about the importance of self-love and having a full life independent of a partner. They discuss how a man who is high value and in a good place in his life will want a woman who has her own life, friends, and interests. The speaker shares their realization that they were not truly high vibrational in the past and how they have changed their standards to attract healthier and more sound individuals. They emphasize the importance of not settling and learning to walk away from situations that are not serving you well.

Mindmap

Keywords

💡Standards

In the context of the video, 'standards' refer to the personal criteria or expectations one sets for themselves, particularly in the realm of dating and relationships. The speaker emphasizes the importance of having high standards to attract and maintain relationships with individuals who align with one's values and aspirations. This concept is central to the video's theme of self-improvement and discernment in choosing partners.

💡Dating

Dating, as discussed in the video, is the social activity of meeting and spending time with potential romantic partners. The speaker uses her own experiences to illustrate the evolution of her dating life and the realization that raising her standards has led to healthier and more fulfilling relationships. The term is integral to the video's narrative, as it serves as the backdrop for the exploration of personal growth and relationship dynamics.

💡Self-improvement

Self-improvement is a recurring theme in the video, highlighting the speaker's journey of personal growth and development. It encompasses the process of recognizing and enhancing one's own qualities, values, and behaviors to achieve a better version of oneself. The speaker advocates for self-improvement as a means to attract and maintain relationships that are aligned with one's improved standards and to lead a more fulfilling life.

💡Attraction

Attraction, in the context of the video, refers to the process of drawing in and being drawn to certain individuals based on one's personal standards and the energy one projects. The speaker discusses how raising her standards has influenced the type of people she attracts, emphasizing that higher standards lead to attracting partners who are more aligned with one's values and aspirations.

💡Healing journey

The term 'healing journey' is used by the speaker to describe her personal process of emotional and psychological recovery from past experiences that did not meet her standards. This journey involves self-reflection, growth, and the setting of new, higher standards for relationships. The concept is crucial to the video's message, as it underscores the importance of personal development in achieving healthier relationships.

💡Vibrations

In the video, 'vibrations' metaphorically represent the energy or aura that one emits, which can influence the type of people and experiences one attracts. The speaker suggests that by raising her standards and improving herself, she has elevated her 'vibrations,' leading to more positive and desirable outcomes in her dating life.

💡Independence

Independence, as discussed in the video, refers to the state of being self-reliant and not overly dependent on others for one's happiness or well-being. The speaker advocates for independence as a key aspect of raising one's standards, emphasizing that it is attractive and leads to healthier relationships where both partners maintain their individuality and personal growth.

💡Desperation

Desperation, in the context of the video, describes a state of hopelessness or urgency that can lead individuals to settle for less than they deserve in relationships. The speaker warns against this feeling, suggesting that it can lower one's standards and result in unhealthy or unsatisfying partnerships. Instead, she encourages viewers to maintain their standards and wait for relationships that truly align with their values.

💡Personal growth

Personal growth is a central theme in the video, referring to the ongoing process of self-improvement and development. The speaker shares her experiences of personal growth, which include recognizing her worth, setting higher standards, and taking responsibility for her own happiness. This growth is portrayed as essential for attracting and maintaining relationships that are fulfilling and aligned with one's improved self.

💡Solitude

Solitude, as used in the video, refers to the state of being alone and content with one's own company. The speaker discusses solitude as a positive state that comes with having high standards, as it allows for self-reflection, personal growth, and the avoidance of settling for less than one deserves in relationships. She encourages viewers to embrace solitude as a means to attract healthier and more valuable relationships.

Highlights

Raising your standards is essential for aligning with your future dating self and attracting the right partners.

The transformation begins with self-reflection and recognizing the need for change in your approach to relationships.

Rejecting low-budget experiences is a key step in elevating your dating standards and self-respect.

Leveling up your mind is as important as improving your physical appearance for a successful self-image and perception by others.

Understanding that your worth and standards should not be compromised by temporary situations or distractions.

Solitude and high standards often go hand in hand, as they reflect a preference for quality over quantity in relationships.

Emotional detachment can be a tool for maintaining high standards, preventing premature emotional bonds that may lead to settling.

Asserting and standing firm on your boundaries and values is crucial for a woman who raises her standards.

Learning to walk away from situations and people that no longer serve your best interests is a powerful act of self-respect.

Decentering your life from men and focusing on personal growth is a strategy for attracting healthier relationships.

Understanding true love involves recognizing the difference between infatuation and a deep, meaningful connection.

Attracting the right partner involves being discerning about who you allow into your life and not settling for less.

Having a full life independently makes you less likely to tolerate poor treatment or unsatisfactory experiences in relationships.

The availability of a potential partner can be an indicator of their overall life management and ambition.

Raising your standards involves a shift in perspective from seeking external validation to cultivating internal self-worth.

The journey of raising your standards is a process of self-discovery, healing, and growth that leads to healthier relationships.

Good men exist in all walks of life, and raising your standards helps you recognize and attract them.

The essence of raising your standards is about aligning your life with your values and desires for a fulfilling future.